After a random spring hiatus, Gossip Girl returned tonight! If you are reading this going, "Shoot! I didn't know it was back on tonight," allow me to introduce you to life saving technology: the DVR series recording.
Tonight's episode opened with Blair arriving at the Humphrey's Brooklyn loft in nothing but her trench coat and some racy black lingerie. Too bad her surprise greeting also greeted Lily, Rufus and William!
I don't like Blair and Dan as a couple so I was kind of thrilled when their first time was lackluster. Naturally Blair couldn't have Dan thinking she's not great at everything, so she forces herself on him in an elevator. Then he returns the favor in a public alley in Williamsburg.
Did anyone else catch that Dan not only had a cabbage patch doll in his room in Brooklyn, but its name was Cedric? How random and weird!
This hour the Van der Woodsens were on a mission to take down Ivy. First Carol calls William to say he better get her the money, then Lola sees Ivy and William talking about an exchange of cash. Just when we think William really is a slime ball, we find out he is actually trying to help Lily! Nice work, writers!
Just as it seems Lily and William will catch Ivy in their trap, Serena sends out a Gossip Girl blast exposing Ivy and her attempt to bribe William. Yup, Serena ruined everything.
When Serena meets Nate back at The Spectator office, he fires her. Can anyone really take Nate seriously as a corporate boss? Come on.
This hour Jack Bass is front and center as Chuck plans to honor him for donating the blood that saved his life. Did anyone else think Jack looked super thin? For a minute I thought a new actor might be playing him.
Toward the middle of the episode we come to find out Jack has Hepatitis C and could not donate blood to Chuck. The blood came from Chuck's biological mother, Elizabeth. Chuck calls his private detective to get him back on the case to hunt her down. Here we go again.
In the final moments of the episode the real Gossip Girl IMs Serena and says she's ready to take back her post. Do you think it's really her?
In previews for next week Diana returns and wants more than just a piece of The Spectator. Watch out, Lola. The cougar is coming for your man.
*Images courtesy of CWTV.com.